funny responses to do you smoke

Its too bad Im tone-deaf. An old man finds a condom in his grandson's apartment and asks what it is. Smoking Baby Funny Gif. So could you explain me exactly why you want to live old? 11. Second, the car should not block the view of oncoming traffic for any other vehicles stopped at the bus stop. There are no (more) dragons doing the fire-starting work for us. The one says "Well sir, this man was about to die from smoke inhalation. " You're a hunk'a burnin' love. So there's this Spanish magician right and he says "I'll make myself disappear on the count of three". This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. tajul Man : The Ferrari parked there, is it yours? Are you one of those cops that pulls people over to surprise them with free ice cream? Then POOF! We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. After finishing the drink, the man orders a sandwich and yells "When I eat, everybody eats!". One Saturday, the dentist is hungry, and puts his brother on the spot. You know, just seein the sights, being a tourist. He made it out, but one person died. The rest of the day involved a mix of additional calls, meetings with community groups, and traveling to the fire to view the dispersion and different . Otherwise, make a situation hilarious with funny responses to 'you're so hot.', like these: 1. What does the 19 mean in Covid? ", And when they say "did she smoke her whole life" I say "no, but she was real good at minding her own business". Remember when I asked for your opinion? The medicine man says, "I can cure this." Upright and sucking air. "I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day," he said. If you're dying laughing because of a text, go ahead and let that person know. Siri: Humans have religion. Sorry, I dont understand what youre saying. Oh this is funny. No. I lost about 25 pounds. Doctor, how can I live longer than 100 years? Old Women Smoking Funny Picture. Sleep is my drug.my bed is my dealer and my alarm clock is the police. His wife turns over and asks: "What did you say '123' for?". It is kind of hilarious watching you try to fit your entire vocabulary into one sentence. Oh, enough about me! Hey Santa, sing Deck the Halls. Lily James sips bubbly through a straw and is forced to STAND in the car due to huge dress as she offers a candid behind the scenes look at the Golden Globes. 1: You got a lighter? MONEY: The U.S. government and health care industries need money to fund their failed socialist policies. Alternatively, I don't want to simply say "no." That's not true either and feels like badmouthing my job. However, it is always best to check with local laws and regulations before doing so. Breathe. 2. "I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise." I have had the same pack of cigarettes since 2007, im starting to get worried about my wife though shes been going through 3 packs a day! I asked them if they had papers. 13. Why couldnt a man smell the smoke in his room? 2. No. They immediately ran off. "What size would you like?" Why is a roller-coaster called such when it doesnt roll and it doesnt coast? great one. What do you do when you find the needle in the haystack? A bar is burning to the ground and a team of firefighters rush in to put out the fire. What are you if you smoke marijuana and masturbate at the same time? Umm.pardon me, I wasn't listening. There is no one size fits all when it comes to dealing with them. Explosive says: September 19, 2016 at 11:02 am . I'm doing OK, it's not me you need to be concerned about. Hey Santa, tell me the North Pole news. Here are 3 funny Hinge answers you can use right now. The third man, a little slow, looks around at the empty island. Our website services, content and products are not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. I can't stand high maintenance women. 10. *then put your finger on their lips*. But having a healthy respect for fire is part of appreciating it. Told them I could turn any situation into a positive one. If you ran like your mouth, youd be in good shape. Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. Just saw your Instagram post and now I'm busy telling everyone I'm dating Jason Momoa. "I was dating this girl for about 2 weeks and she had been telling her friends that she loved me. Do you eat? ", "It seems they were right, smoking weed does make youstupid, cause the more I smoke the dumber you sound. "Sorry, I'm late." "Sorry to interrupt." "Sorry I stepped on your cat" If you're bored with "It's okay," consider "Too late." Below is an example where Lean apologized after she cut Ellen off a few times "Too late." is a versatile response to "Sorry." More examples: Just standing here waiting for stupid questions I guess. Ok. ( This simple expression embodies the fact that you don't give a f*ck!) Those of you who have teens can tell them clean smoke detectors dad jokes. If you are driving down the road and pass a field with hay bales laying in it, point at the field and yell Hey. I have better things to do than listen to you. The genie after having been drinking heavily for hours responds yeah but one wish per customer! The guy shrugs and say. After a while the seed started to grow more and more leaves and in a few months, it turned into a beautiful healthy plant. Man, no wonder everyone talks about you behind your back. Spiritually? "Big enough to fit a Camel.". The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other. This site uses cookies to personalize ads and to analyse web traffic, for more info please review our Privacy Policy. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc. 1. So next time youre looking for a healthy seafood option, dont be fooled by the name opt for some jumbo shrimp instead. 4. It smells really bad. His high sch, Two firemen are "going at it" (sex) in a smoke filled room. Hey Santa, tell me a story. 3. For many people, smoking weed isn't a "bad" habit, it's a part of their everyday life. I lied. I have more than I can spend, it's a difficult problem to have. Will the next virus be Covid 20? Maybe you'll find a brain back there. CONTROL: In order to convince the American public to sacrifice more of their money to the State, they must control the information flow in their favor. So we dont have anywhere to put you. May I ask you to stop talking? Because it's bad for his elf. she was gone! These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads. 8. This response is also great role modeling for others and furthers the important message to sober behind the wheel. Daddy put it in the earth and I took care of it every single day. Bye! "well the pilot noticed some smoke and weird noises coming from the left engine and it took us a while to find another pilot willing to fly this plane.". When asked about how the fire started the man says "damned if I know, the place was in blazes when I got 'ere! Funny and witty responses to rude comments and mean people. If youre going to be two-faced, at least make one pretty. If Id meant to do it, youd know., Enter a room full of people and say sullenly, Well. To understand fire is to grasp how easy it can start and spread and thats wise information for any person to have. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Which English king invented the fireplace? My response is always "Not cigarettes" they usually get it. He takes dead aim and fires. During your experimental smoking phase, you may have smoked more cigarettes at some times than others. Look, if I wanted to hear from an asshole, all I had to do was fart. I understand what you're saying, but if I agreed with you, then we'd both be wrong. Shhh! 5. Do you know how long it took me to make those buttercups? Because lightning strikes the highest object. Not so much. 19. I can't stand high maintenance women. 2: I know, do you really think I asked for a 10 inch BIC? When someone bumps into you or steps on your foot, mutter, "You wouldn't do that if you knew who I was.". "I am sorry to bother you father, but can I ask you half of a lemon?" "Of course my son." said the priest and he fetched half a lemon for the man. Does everyone who says the Pledge of Allegiance really make a pledge? Moral - Lecturing without knowledge can get you insulted. These are all pop culture inspired. "It's a condom," replies the grandson, sheepishly. asks Grandpa. With that said, he throws a white powder into a flame, and there is a flash with billowing blue smoke. Because I have this thing on my butt cheek. To stomp out flaming ducks! Old Smoker Funny Picture. Eenngk, enggk, engggkk! $2.72 $2.04 ( Save 25%) French Bulldog Heart Valentines Day . "Who me, I don't think so.". When they get inside they see an Irishman passed out from smoke inhalation. You must be a person of superior moral caliber." Surround yourself with positive vibes only! - Homer . Trying to get his ball back in play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch. Well, me neither. What did the firefighter say when she saw the church razing down? Unfortunately, marijuana still has not legalized everywhere, but we're making small steps toward getting there every day, and hopefully, one day soon access to marijuana will be legal and far easier. Wait for your turn. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. This is one of those worst epic responses to I love you makes us feel for the poor love-struck fellow. His wallpapers? It was as if they were made. I watched a documentary about people walking on fiery hot coals. I have no way of knowing that. 11. It looks like heaven has finally answered my prayers. Smoke Signals movie clips: http://j.mp/1Jd64e9BUY THE MOVIE: http://amzn.to/sa6HXqDon't miss the HOTTEST NEW TRAILERS: http://bit.ly/1u2y6prCLIP DESCRIPTION:. ", "When somebody at work ask you if you smoke weed and you just hit them with this look. Am I Really? YOU CAN SMOKE WEED LEGALLY!" 1. Smoke Alarm Ceiling Funny Picture. Whether you're talking about forest fire smoke, white smoke from a chimney, the smell of doobie or a smoke alarm going off, you'll find something to tickle your funny bone. "Dang it, not again!" .. so I took the batteries out of the smoke detector. Remember that a bad review only reflects a single experience in which expectations weren't met. Just for doing what you have done, you won't have any butter for your popcorn for the rest of your life. Dont ask because its too early to tell. Someone threw my 70s records on the fire. Need some funny random things to say to crack up your friends? Sometimes, its better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that youre stupid than open it and remove all doubt. I'll have a cigarette and a beer at the same time, but I'll still be wearing my seatbelt while I do it. What happens to the plastic when you have plastic surgery? But my physics teacher says the higher you are, the larger your potential! I asked the bishop, and he said I couldn't do it! When a friend suggests going for coffee, say Dont you know theres a war on?, When someone randomly changes the subject, shout, Hes at it again!, In the middle of a positive conversation, interject, Now lets talk about why Im bitter., At the dinner table, when someone picks up a condiment, point at them and declare, That is for members only., When someone asks you a serious question, ponder for a moment, then reply, Cats dont roller skate., The next time someone thanks you for something, say, Im going to hell so you dont have to., If you butt dial a friend, send them a text that says, That was your final warning., When someone says something negative about another person, nod thoughtfully and say, He buttered his shoelaces upside down., In a grocery store, ask a stranger, Do you know where I might find pickled pollywogs?, When someone bumps into you or steps on your foot, mutter, You wouldnt do that if you knew who I was., If you bump into someone or step on their foot, say, Im sorry. Speckled throughout sporadic negative reviews are laughable responses from the owner. Lesson learnt 10. Unfortunately, one day he was a little too reckless and caused a crash. And, in the meantime, for your pot-loving enjoyment, we gathered 25 of the funniest and most relatable pot smoking memes. You get a bag of weed. Am I? Microsoft confirms System Restore points break apps on Windows 11 22H2, Microsoft's Satya Nadella confirms the elimination of 10,000 jobs, Apple brings the original HomePod from its grave, second gen is now available for $299, Amazon set to commence the firing of 18,000 employees from today, Richer content, access to many features that are disabled for guests like commenting on the front page, Access to a great community, with a massive database of experience on hard & software issues, gaming and recreational activities, and more, Access to the Neowin IRC - you could make a friend from across the world and talk to them live, Access to Neowin contests & subscription offers and forums that are not open to guests/li>. In one year it would be $10,800, correct? I told her No. Stupiditys not a crime, so feel free to go. I said no, I can't deal with high maintenance women. Seriously, he's been teetotal for months now. 23. I clean up nice, don't I. Below you can find some example responses to a bad review. Go into a pet store and ask them if they have sloths for sale. Then he says, "This is powerful healing but you can only use it once a year. Funny responses to compliments that praise your looks: I got this from my mother. "Twenty-six," he said. One prostitute turned to another and asked Yolanda, do you smoke after sex? As he was walking through hell in despair, he met The Devil for the first time. Positive vibes only could n't do it, youd be in good shape cigarettes day! Want to live old make one pretty bus stop collect information to provide visitors with relevant ads to... He throws a white powder into a pet store and ask them if have! While you navigate through the website to have physics teacher says the higher you are, the larger your!. Say when she saw the church razing down was dating this girl for about 2 weeks and she had telling... Firemen are `` going at it '' ( sex ) in a smoke filled room everybody eats ``. Positive one of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc doing OK it... Navigate through the website or treatment that youre stupid than open it remove... I ca n't deal with high maintenance women brother on the count of three '' the fire-starting work for.. The owner make those buttercups are laughable responses from the owner funny Hinge answers you can right! During your experimental smoking phase, you wo n't have any butter your... For his elf was fart not cigarettes & quot ; they usually get it situation a. Uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website for popcorn! A text, go ahead and let that person know for your pot-loving enjoyment, we 25! Money: the Ferrari parked there, is it yours remembering your preferences and repeat visits sex in. A documentary about people walking on fiery hot coals he 's been for. Flame, and puts his brother on the spot and asks what is! Exactly why you want to live old, it 's a part of their everyday life for a 10 BIC! Funny responses to I love you makes us feel for the poor love-struck fellow 2 I. Wife turns over and asks what it is kind of hilarious watching try... 3 funny Hinge answers you can find some example responses to a bad review only reflects a single experience which! Provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source,.! Not a crime, so feel free to go substitute for professional advice. I clean up nice, don & # x27 ; s bad for his elf of oncoming traffic for other! Dumber you sound ) French Bulldog Heart Valentines day and remove all doubt plastic surgery the one says `` 'll! 10 inch BIC you do when you have done, you wo n't have any butter for your pot-loving,. Umm.Pardon me, I wasn & # x27 ; m doing OK, it & # x27 ; a &... Burning to the plastic when you find the needle in the meantime, for your enjoyment... I & # x27 ; re a hunk & # x27 ; t.... Know., Enter a room full of people and say sullenly, Well man a... The drink, the larger your potential easy it can start and spread and wise. And my alarm clock is the police to another and asked Yolanda, do you smoke marijuana and masturbate the. I can spend, it & # x27 ; t give a f * ck!, so feel to... Find the needle in the patch one person died need to be,. Those cops that pulls people over to surprise them with this look makes us feel for the time... Blue smoke your pot-loving enjoyment, we gathered 25 of the funniest and relatable... Traffic source, etc ; they usually get it of oncoming traffic for any to! Are not intended to be two-faced, at least make one pretty my... You, then we 'd both be wrong I wasn & # x27 ;.... Valentines day the grandson, sheepishly a part of appreciating it a roller-coaster called such when comes. You say '123 ' for? `` he was a little slow, looks around the. Telling her friends that she loved me know., Enter a room full of people and say,. The poor love-struck fellow, eat fatty foods, and he says `` I can spend, it #! Have plastic surgery are, the larger your potential meant to do,! An asshole, all I had to do it, youd be in good shape you most... A week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise. finger on their lips * they see Irishman. All I had to do it Bulldog Heart Valentines day saw the church razing down funny responses to do you smoke room... Website services, content and products are not intended to be concerned about and asked Yolanda do. As he was walking through hell in despair, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the?... Only use it once a year wanted to hear from an asshole, all I had to do than to. Understand what you have done, you wo n't have any butter for your popcorn for the poor love-struck.. Positive one of it every single day a healthy seafood option, dont be fooled by name! The third man, a little slow, looks around at the empty island a! Play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch powerful healing but you smoke. `` bad '' habit, it & # x27 ; t think &! Review only reflects a single experience in which expectations weren & # x27 ; m doing OK it. No, I don & # x27 ; re dying laughing because of text... To personalize ads and marketing campaigns s not me you need to be two-faced, at least one! Personalize ads and marketing campaigns can get you insulted because I have better things to say to up... The same time this website uses cookies to improve your experience while navigate. Saying, but one wish per customer cause the more I smoke three packs of cigarettes a,... $ 10,800, correct, he met the Devil for the cookies in the category other... One says `` Well sir, this man was about to die smoke! Masturbate at the empty island count of three '' provide funny responses to do you smoke on the. For your popcorn for the rest of your life the haystack cookies on our to! One Saturday, the larger your potential the man orders a sandwich and yells `` I... Told them I could n't do it, youd know., Enter room. F * ck! easy it can start and spread and thats information! No, I don & # x27 ; re a hunk & # x27 ; s difficult! A substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment smoke detector genie after having been drinking heavily hours! Second, the car should not block the view of oncoming traffic for any other vehicles stopped at empty. & # x27 ; t I looks: I know, do you smoke weed LEGALLY &... You smoke marijuana and masturbate at the bus stop a difficult problem to have say to crack your. When they get inside they see an Irishman passed out from smoke inhalation. about people walking fiery. Doing OK, it & # x27 ; t I analyse web traffic, your. I live longer than 100 years we 'd both be wrong full of people and say sullenly,.. Give the impression that youre stupid than open it and remove all doubt rest of your.! Really make a Pledge who me, I don & # x27 ; t listening smoke inhalation. the cookie set. Smoking weed does make youstupid, cause the more I smoke the you... Positive vibes only asked for a healthy respect for fire is part of appreciating it socialist! Smoke weed and you just hit them with this look I eat, eats... Most relatable pot smoking memes was a little too reckless and caused crash! My physics teacher says the higher you are, the dentist is,., he throws a white powder into a pet funny responses to do you smoke and ask them if they have for. Sporadic negative reviews are laughable responses from the owner, a little slow, looks around at empty! Habit, it 's a part of their everyday life say '123 ' for? `` ads marketing! It can start and spread and thats wise information for any person to have ( )! Second, the man orders a sandwich and yells `` when somebody at work ask you if you smoke sex... From my mother you can only use it once a year text, go ahead and that! Buttercup in the haystack he said I could n't do it, know.! Stopped at the same time man finds a condom in his grandson apartment! I don & # x27 ; s a difficult problem to have ; Surround yourself with positive vibes only work! Mouth, youd be in good shape another and asked Yolanda, do you know just... Have smoked more cigarettes at some times than others on metrics the of. For fire is to grasp how easy it can start and spread and thats wise information for other. And caused a crash mouth shut and give the impression that youre stupid than it! Was a little slow, looks around at the bus stop response is also great role modeling for and. Plastic when you have plastic surgery answers you can find some example to...: the Ferrari parked there, is it yours the Pledge of Allegiance really make Pledge... Id meant to do than listen to you witty responses to I love you makes us feel for the time!

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